The more I live, the more I see…we’re all looking for love and acceptance. Some are braver than others, but however you express it, be proud that you did. Be proud of the fact that you did not hold back even if you were REJECTED, because the more vulnerable you are, the more human you are, and the closer you are to finding that special someone who’ll get you. We are not robot’s, we are meant to feel, to love, to hurt, to cry, to smile, to live and rest. I pray that with the limited time I have, I get to touch each and everyone of you in some way! You are loved! +Lady V


Go to SLEEP!


Every relationship has arguments…but there comes a time when you have to say, “this is getting old.” You wanna know something “old married couples,” hardly argue, so don’t ever use that metaphor again. And if they do they’ve learned to agree or disagree without disrupting the NEIGHBORS!!!! And to be honest what would they argue over anyways, where’s the medicine, the bingo chips, the newspaper, my teeth!!! Arguments show a lack of constraint  and compassion to a certain extent. Everyone wants to be right, no one wants to listen. Blah blah blah!

When faced with an issue stop and think, then ask, “how can we resolve it without screaming our heads off?” Domestic disputes happen all the time, we’ve had our share. Instead of letting it escalate go somewhere and COOL OFF. If you’re married…we recommend a hot shower and some make-up #sex.


Proverbs 15:1
A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Ephesians 4:26
Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,

2 Timothy 2:14
Remind them of these things, and charge them before God not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers.

James 1:19
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;

Titus 3:9
But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law, for they are unprofitable and worthless.

Don’t Give Up


Rather you know it or not, marriage is similar to working out. Everyone wants a killer body/relationship, but how many are willing to put in the work? After the initial excitement has wore off, you start to feel like “ugh not today, tomorrow!” I’ll be the first to admit, it’s hard work to maintain a healthy marriage. You have to be present, be active and be sensitive.

Let’s compare it to working out just for a moment. When you have that feeling of, “hey I’m gonna workout” …you prepare yourself mentally and physically. You scout gyms, a swolemate, shoes, workout gear, even a fancy water bottle. The very next day you’ll either lace up or say, “I’ll get to it some other time.” If you do get off the couch, you’ll see that it’s more work then you anticipated. A marriage is no different. You get prepared mentally and physically, you buy the gear and then you either propose or you wait and wait for the right time. Finally after you work up some nerves, you realize it’s hard work. The planning of the wedding then the marriage. Now that you’ve started a marriage allow me to give you three steps to stick it out…

Step 1. Don’t compare your start to someone else’s end. Rather you’ve been married for 11hrs or 11 yrs develop your own rhythm. Like lifting weights…Don’t go behind the guy lifting 350, thinking you’ll get ripped like him by lifting his max. No sir, if 150 is your max then stick with that, over time you’ll build strength. When it comes to your marriage know you and your spouse limit. If you see an argument going in the wrong direction…pause and lighten the load. Don’t ever provoke.

Step 2. Don’t isolate yourself. You’re in a marriage, which means you ought to be building together. I see married couples who are not even concerned about their spouse, do you not know they’re a reflection of you? Don’t leave them during the good times or the tough times.

Step 3. Keep the excitement going! When it comes to working out, you can get burned out quickly. So trainers recommend music, energy bars or drinks…(please stick with the healthy choices). The excitement in your marriage will last as long as you make it exciting. If all you do is watch T.V. and eat HoHo’s then you’re gonna run into a problem, or better yet slouch into a problem…because all those HoHo’s will prevent you from running. Kick up the romance, add some play time into your busy schedule.

Don’t look at your marriage and dread it, get excited and get help! For counseling or speaking events, please contact our office at 951-665-8475, or by email at

Until next time be happy my friends.

Being Super Successful

World's Oldest Married Couple

Being successful is a dream many can accomplish, but being super successful is a dream most people give up on because they feel like it’s out of their reach. I read an article that listed seven powerful habits of super successful people. They all made an impact on me, but No. 3 really hit home!

They pick themselves up and try again when they fail

Super successful people do not set limitations on themselves because this will only hinder their success. They understand that failure is part of their journey and no matter how many times they fall, they pick themselves up and try again.

Preach!!! LOL! Failure, often comes with success. Every successful person has experience failure on their journey, so don’t beat yourself up. Maybe getting fired helped you become an entrepreneur. Maybe that argument made you realize how much you are loved and your need to express that love back. Maybe being humiliated humbled you. I love picking myself up no matter how hard I’ve fallen because when I get up, I’m smarter, stronger and faster than before. Like with this book, No More Bed Gaps, it’s been trial and error from start to finish. We’ve slept far away and sometimes in separate rooms, but we’ve managed to get a little closer each night until those bed gaps were eliminated. Never give up on yourself, your dreams or your marriage. You have to be brave enough to say, “let’s try it again, and again.”

Here’s a super successful tip from Herbert and Zelmyra, “Remember marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win.”

I love it!

Mrs. Taylor


Photo/Quote: “World’s Oldest Married Couple,”
Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of North Carolina. They have been married 85 years (YourBlackWorld.Net)

Peter Economy, (
7 Powerful Habits of Super Successful People

It’s Been Hell


Why are people afraid to say…”it’s been hell?!” Well, Terry Crews didn’t hold back on today’s (6/4/15) episode on The Real.

Terry Crews told the ladies that, “they’ve been through hell,” and by the looks on their faces you can tell they wasn’t ready for that, lol. He loves his wife, of 25 yrs, Rebecca King Crews, aka “The CEO” together they have 5 kiddos!!!! And they rep Christ!

I applaud couples who keep it REAL. Everybody wants a bomb relationship, but don’t want to go through anything.
I’m happy for them and for their success. I love seeing couples together and happy despite the odds.  #teamcrews

God Invented Sex


It’s always easy to digest something when you know that it  came from someone who loves you and has your best interest at heart. When we hear the word sex, we’re either turned off or turned on. Why, because of the world we live in. What was meant to be scared and beautiful has become raunchy and overrated. Boobs are on display and butts are becoming the topic of the day!  What’s a guy to do, what’s a girl to do?

Fellas, Don’t Lust! Ladies, Don’t Compete!

Who invented these body parts, God and they have their special functions. Who invented sex, the same holy, sovereign God! His only requirements were to get married young man and young woman. It’s better to marry than to burn (in lust) 1Cor. 7:9. We tempt ourselves and wonder why we can’t settle for one woman or one man. What I feared most about sex, was not enjoying it! The ultimate disrespect, is to be in the act and be counting sheep’s.
(Futher reading 1 Corinthians 7-9)

We have to get rid of this distorted view of sex. Why would you want to have a quickie when you can have something that will last from morning till night. I’m talking about love, romance, and bomb sex.

I have some advice for you! If you’re sexing someone other than your spouse STOP! YEP, GO COLD TURKEY! You’re not helping yourself or the person you’re giving yourself to. Set some standards, don’t you want to have something to look forward to on your honeymoon night, instead you’ll be thinking about all the women or men you’ve let sample your goods.

If you are married, and haven’t had sex in awhile, what’s stopping you? Now is the time to have some fun, and explore your spouse in a way that has such amazing benefits.

If you’re lusting all day and all night, STOP laying up on Instagram, Facebook, and Google+. Hide, delete, or ban the app for a few weeks, so you can come back to reality. You’ll be surprised at the sexual content on Social Media. Now is the time to feed your spirit not your flesh.  “Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls” ( James 1:21 ESV).

Hello, I’m Vivacious!


I was once caught up in the hype: trying to look good, feel good and sound good, all the while, I was losing my spunk!

Here are 3 signs you may not be all that vivacious:

1. If you’re up all night stressing about how to make a dollar out of 15 cents, instead of enjoying the peace, or the beautiful human laying beside you.

V. Advice:  Stop wasting precious moments. Even a “boss bish” want a King to spoon with. So spoon or go to bed.

2. You motivate people, but you’re all tapped out and often times you need a pep talk yourself.

V. Advice: A laugh, a kiss, a hug from a vivacious person is all it takes to awaken your senses. Spend some time remembering why you signed up for this life. Visit a place or a person that will help you see the rainbow not the pot of gold.

3. You’re not happy? Sure you post pic with fake smiles and pals you can’t stand on Instagram, lol!

V. Advice: You should want to see yourself happy, and living an attractive life! You can have all the beauty, body and money and still be miserable! You could have all the answers, but never apply any of them? Even a doctor has to take medicine from time to time. If your method works, then follow it, or should I say swallow it!

I’m sure this post will cause you to see your life for what it is.  Live my friends, love, and laugh. There are many who have less than you, but they’re vivacious!  What’s your excuse!

Last V. Advice: Skip the routine and watch a funny film, or something romantic, (not horrific or erotic), you need a vivacious boost.